1. Sweetums - Sweetums is a giant hairy Ogre thing. He's usually a bad guy on some level, and he carries a large club, with which in his first appearance he broke a giant stone pillar. He's only got the two teeth, but I'm pretty sure they both mean business.
2. Oscar The Grouch - I sort of believe Oscar is the Clint Eastwood of Sesame Street. There's really no indication of what he might be keeping in that trashcan, so I'm forced to assume it's firearms. Or possibly just a lighter. Go ahead. Bang on his can. Find out. Punk.
3. Grover - Grover always sort of seems like the crackhead of the muppets, and that means he's alright with stabbing you for a fix, but more importantly, Grover is insane. In 1971 there was a book published called "the monster at the end of this book" Grover's goal throughout the book, was to convince the reader not to finish the book, lest they face the monster at the end. (spoiler alert) It's Grover. And if you finish the book he jumps out of the page and kills you (I just saved your life, and if anyone tells you the end is different, he's lying, had he finished it, Grover would have killed him). He's got multiple personalities, and I believe most of them are murderous.
4. Miss Piggy - When I was a kid, I always just figured miss piggy was a spoiled brat, and that if someone started not giving her what she wanted, she'd learn to be a more independent figure. As it is, Miss Piggy has a violent temper and is particularly demanding of her unwilling lover, Kermit. Miss Piggy is also a Pig. A funny thing happens when you stop spoiling pigs. They get feral. Feral pigs kill. Tell her no. Go for it. Just expect a change.
5. Animal - When I was little we had a crazy (fictional) uncle named Ivan. His (fictional) son, Sven challenged him to consume an entire drumset. Uncle Ivan died that day. Animal is the craziest puppet in the world. And he eats drumsets constantly. If he can eat a drumset, he can eat you. And he's always hungry. Always.
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